Toxic Prayer

“The Lord upholds all who are falling, and raises up all who are bowed down.” Ps 145:14

It’s sad, so sad,

Why can’t we talk it over?

Oh it seems to me

That sorry seems to be the hardest word.

(“Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word” Elton John)

Many popular songs center around two themes: love lost and love found. The song included today describes the pain of love lost and what appears to be the inability to apologize that has ruined the relationship.

Our topic is unforgiveness and with it the toxicity of not consistently practicing a lifestyle of forgiveness. A fruitful prayer life is contaminated by unforgiveness. When a person has been hurt the natural (sinful) reaction is to recoil and refuse to try to talk out the pain and disappointment. The deeper the bonds of intimacy the more penetrating is the pain of alienation caused by these offences. The more serious danger is to harbor a grudge and refuse to even be open to forgiveness and reconciliation. Unforgiveness flourishes when pride, arrogance and self satisfaction are cultivated. Guard yourself!

To some degree the reaction of unforgiveness can be a way of punishing someone for offending us. But who ends up getting punished? In this state we pass on the verdict to ourselves as our relationship with a forgiving God is given a cold shoulder (Matt 11:24-25). Night enters and a deadly darkness is allowed to take hold of us which severs us from God’s forgiveness and freedom in worship of Him (Matt 5:23-24). Save yourself!

The Scriptures warn us that when unforgiveness sets in it gives permission for the “tortures” to start their vexation (Matt 18:34). These tortures are not people but inner mental, emotional and spiritual punishers. Enter fear, loneliness, rejection, depression, insecurity, frustration, self-hatred and endless re-runs of justifying self-talk. Then, in our bankruptcy, we are left with bitterness and resentment – not a pretty place. Spare yourself!

Much of the spiritual life is focused on one goal: mastery of our inner reactions. Though the greater the intimacy with a person the greater the likelihood of painful offences occurring what is also true it that our ability to know that person is enhanced by a forgiving atmosphere where we can be vulnerable. Marriage should offer this and our relationship with God certainly invites it. Keeping short accounts with God and man is the key to spiritual self-mastery.

Prayer Without Love is a Myth

“. . forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you.” Col 3:13

If you were to ask 100 staff at a Christian social working mission for a study topic for their spiritual edification what response do you think you would get. I asked this question and the answer was surprising. The majority desired a study on the topic of “forgiveness”. Recently, the need to master this subject was brought home again when I heard of a pastor who had been involved with pastoral counseling for 20 years and remarked that, according to his observation, 90 percent of all problems are rooted in unforgiveness. The personal devastation of harboring unforgiveness is so toxic is it any wonder that Jesus pounded the message of forgiveness home with vivid emphasis.

Jesus suffered terribly from words and deeds that sought to destroy His character. His response teaches us how to respond to suffering. To excel in handling suffering is to learn to forgive as Christ taught us. It is inevitable that we are going to get hurt, the question is how will we respond. When the apostle Peter suggested that we forgive seven times he did not give a bad answer but Jesus ramped it up even higher by correcting him and making it “seven times seven”. This was like saying we are to forgive indefinitely times indefinitely. A tall order, but Jesus made the consequences for failure equally extreme.

Jesus taught (Matt 18:34,35) that failure to forgive would mean torture or severe punishment! The main point: the kingdom of God is a matter of forgiveness. Jesus underlines this point in His blood and we will be judged on how we who have received this blood-wrought forgiveness practice it. Seems extreme, was Jesus exaggerating maybe? Well, turning to Matt 6:14:15 we see Jesus choosing to expound on only one area of the teaching he has just delivered via the Lord’s Prayer. Again, He picks up on the necessity of forgiveness by reiterating: “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father also will forgive you; but if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses”. It is that important.

I will continue this important subject next week but I hope you have been reminded of the necessity to practice Christ-like forgiveness. One might be lead to say that the hardest part of being a Christian is forgiving but it is central because the spirit of forgiveness is the spirit of love. Suffering and forbearing love energizes prayer.

Ardor for Adoration

“. . . let us continually offer a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that acknowledge his name.” Heb 13:15

What image of God motivates your prayer life? Could it simply be the One whom we go to in order to supply what we need or the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ? The prime act of prayer should be loving adoration of God. Now, adoration has been defined as having two sides: thanksgiving and praise. What is the difference and does it matter?

At a glance, it is hard not to find a Psalm that does not rise to thanksgiving: “O give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.” (Ps 106:1). The life of Christ or even the evidences through the apostle Paul’s writing testify that both were grateful people who lived in a spirit of thanksgiving. In fact, we can say that the signature of the Christ filled life is thanksgiving (1Thess 5:16).

If we were to make a distinction, however, praise lies at a higher plane than thanksgiving and if we examine our prayer life we might find that, unfortunately, it is not as frequently practiced. So, take this week’s prayer message as a coaching encouragement rather than a guilt trip! In his classic work, “Prayer”, O Hallesby states that “when we give thanks, my thoughts still circle about myself to some extent. But in praise my soul ascends to self-forgetting adoration, seeing and praising only the majesty and power of God, His grace and redemption.” Praise to God means loving Him for who He is and not just for the benefits He bestows on us personally.

This might interest you: when a person gets caught up in praise the Bible speaks of this euphoric or intense praise as “blessing”.   When we “bless” God we express jubilant praise. One notable example is found in St Luke’s gospel which concludes with the crescendo of the thrilling words of the people remaining in the temple “blessing God”. It must have been like a revival meeting where God was so real to the people, and His loving heart so tangible, that they were caught up in ecstatic praise. We were made to, “Bless the Lord, O my soul and all that is within me bless his holy name.” (Ps 103:1) Spend some time in adoration this week!

Divine Protection

“I proclaimed a fast so that we might humble ourselves before our God, and ask him for a safe journey for us and our children, with all our possessions.” Ezra 8:21

It equates to about a 48 hour journey by car, plane, taxi, and bus. This is the combination of transportation that my eldest son had to undergo recently in order to be reunited with his wife as he traveled from our family home here in Nebraska to Uganda. That makes for a lot of connections and a lot of possibilities for things to go wrong. In an age of jet travel when we can boast of “dinner in New York and lunch in Paris”, unfortunately we could also add “luggage in Amsterdam” – oops! Travelling across the globe then travelling into a third world country that appears to operate on a more organic and haphazard set of rules than we in the west are accustomed to makes for a high level of stress. Imagine grabbing a mini bus taxi, designed to seat 8, and finding yourself one of 14 passengers buzzing down the highway and dodging anything in your way! Although our son was only responsible for himself he did have precious cargo in the form of several suitcases and money that he needed to guard and ensure it all arrived at his destination intact. Would he make it?

Our Scripture passage today references Ezra’s leadership as he faced a long and potentially dangerous journey through some pretty formidable terrain. It is part of the account of the children of Israel returning to Jerusalem from their time of captivity in Babylon. Not only was it a long journey of about four months but it contained the risk of bandits and thieves upsetting the safety of the travelers and looting their possessions.  Ezra faced a choice to counter this threat. He is offered military protection from the foreign king but declines and chooses to radically trust in “God’s gracious hand” (v.22) to protect them. Ezra strategically and specifically directs the people to join him in petitioning God for their safety with fasting. And the Lord delivered them. Oh, by the way, my son made it too.

For most of us it is easy to trust in God for our day to day travel here in Nebraska. Cars are reliable and roads are good – risks are low. Yet could it be that God is waiting to deliver us from bigger and more formidable dangers that are ravaging or seeking to ravage our nation. I think of the threat to our religious freedom or the redefining of marriage. Might God be calling us to petition Him with fasting for safe passage?

It is not Good for the Fast to be Alone

“While they were worshipping the Lord and fasting.” Acts 13:2

I live in Nebraska but I love the sea coast. Maybe that is the Aussie surfer in me whose youth was filled with annual vacations at the beach. Walking along a gorgeous sandy beach is a taste of heaven: the water lapping methodically at the shore, your bare feet tracking in the wet sand, and the refreshing salt breeze on your face. At the coast there is space and a quiet that soothes the heart. In a place like this I naturally think of God.  A natural reaction to this kind of beauty is to want to share the experience with someone, either directly with a companion or indirectly by recounting it through Facebook or the like.

Fasting is not meant to be alone, it exists to have a spiritual companion. The Scriptures remind us that we are commanded to fast and pray, or to seek the Lord with fasting. The act of fasting creates the environment for these other spiritual activities to thrive. Do you realize that it is impossible to really love the Lord and not adore Him. Fasting detaches us from the pull of the earth and enables us to rise to heaven more freely in our prayer life. Fasting is like a walk on the beach with God as our companion. God loves to be with us and to share with us. It is our prayer life that develops this adoration and fasting adds passion to it. You are what you pray!

Love for God’s creation or love for God intensifies our hunger to know about the object of our love. Love intensifies knowledge. In a spiritual sense,  fasting humbles us so that knowledge may increase and prayer then moves into adoration. Prayer forms us as people because this venue brings us into intimate contact with God. There are other spiritual benefits to fasting as well. Many people speak of a heightened liberty in intercessory prayer and worship, greater insights into Bible study, new awareness of personal sin, or clarity for seeking direction. Think of Moses who received the commandments of the Lord, a tangible expression of the holiness of God, in a climate of fasting and waiting on the Lord (Deut 9:9-10). Fasting gives us a new kind of appetite.